I never wanted to smoke cigarettes for the high

No I wanted to smoke to be cool to be fashionably

To be the dream

The cool girl

Though I absolutely despise the smell of them

It’s like wanting the one thing you hate most

Wanting the thing that you are constantly trying to stay away from

I want nothing more then to be the cool girl under bleachers

That all the girls hate because they think she’s a whore or a troublemaker

I want to be the girl that all the guys say are easy though she was the one playing them

I want to be the girl who doesn’t give a fuck about anyone or thing

I want to be the girl that secretly everyone was afraid of

I want to be the dream

Though that’s just fantasy because me and cigarettes will never get along

But oh to be the fantasy

The myth

The girl outside the feminine and
“high maintenance”

Though being that girl comes with a cost

Of losing innocent way to young and raising yourself because god knows when mom comes back home


And god knows when dad will wake up from drinking to many beers and siting in-front of the TV


The girls that are all to familiar of the smell of smoke so they light cigarettes for comfort more then the addiction


For the one thing that gave them some sense of home


The cool girl is more then a chick who is down for whatever whenever she girl who is lost and clinging on to what feels almost like stability and home

The cool girl is the one working two jobs to help her and her brother

She is not some piece of ass you call whenever, she is a warrior trapped inside a hurt little girl

So for the cool girls I give this poem

To let you know that one day things will change and you can let the walls come crashing down.